Friday, June 24, 2011

Wishing more for boy or girl?

Have you ever just wished and hoped that you would have a girl?  Those frilly little dresses and giant hairbows are so much fun! What about a bouncing baby boy? They are supposed to be Mommy’s boys, right? When you have an expectation and dream of having one or the other, it is somewhat disappointing when you find out that your expectation is actually not reality.

This is my third pregnancy. I wanted a little girl so bad when I was pregnant the first time and that is what I got! I was actually surprised and had psyched myself up for a boy because that was my “feeling.” I loved the pink and all of the “girly” things. My Rachel was perfect and I could not have been happier with the boy/girl situation.

When I got pregnant the 2nd time I had so many people ask me what I wanted and if I was trying for a boy. First of all, I think that is kind of a dumb question. How exactly do you try for a boy?  Anyway, my response often sounded something like this: “I would be thrilled with a boy but I would love for Rachel to have a little sister too.” See, I never had a sister and always wanted one so I really wanted that connection and I had so much fun with the first girl I knew the 2nd would be so much fun. I was content with two girls.

Now, this time around…although I was not “trying” for a boy that was my wish. I really really wanted a boy this time. I actually felt like it was a boy. I was nauseated and sick (which I never experienced in my first two pregnancies…at all), I am carrying this baby differently, and things are just different than my other two. Well, it is a girl. Another girl. I will say that I was disappointed. I really feel like we are done after this baby but I just wanted that Mommy’s boy and a little guy in our house. It’s actually funny. My husband does not have a preference either way. His response was, “What does it matter?” He loves his girls (as do I, don’t get me wrong) but my dreams of having a little boy are just not going to happen – not right now anyway. Likely, not ever unless we change our minds later.

I am actually better now…I am happy that so far my little girl looks healthy and developing well. I am thrilled that my two girls will have a baby sister but I guess God just decided we need a little more drama in our home!

What do you think about the gender issue? Working in the hospital, I have seen people so upset about the gender of their baby that they didn’t want to have anything to do with the baby when it was born. (Please don’t think I am there). I have read several things that talk about people choosing the gender of their babies.  I am curious to hear your thoughts about this.

Rikki Hester is a social worker at Texas Health Arlington Memorial Hospital and Mom of two girls (soon to be three!).

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